What Makes Selfcare Selfcare?
Selfcare is a buzzword and often a marketing ploy to get you to buy some product or service (even mine!). But selfcare isn’t something that comes from outside of you by its very definition. Selfcare, real selfcare, is an inside job.
So it’s not about what you might buy, or where you might travel, or what activity you might engage in. All of that might be part of it, but it actually isn’t the important part!
For example, you might be feel that selfcare is an indulgence in your favorite gourmet ice cream from time to time. Maybe it is and maybe it isn’t. It really depends on you. When you reach for the ice cream, it it an act of self-love and kindness or is it an act of escapism and apathy? Just like yoga can either be nurturing selfcare that’s gentle on the joints and tissues, or it can be a practice in pushing your limits and pulling your ligaments. Again, it depends on you. Anything that we may approach or do in the name of selfcare doesn’t make it selfcare. So what does?
Selfcare is About Two Things
Selfcare is really about one) our attitude and two) our approach.
In regards to attitude, it’s about coming from a position of caring about yourself, valuing yourself, as much as you care about anyone or anything else. It’s an awareness and acceptance of both our strengths and shortcomings with a maturity that helps us own up to both. And more importantly, it is a commitment to our own personal evolution…not the ever-moving benchmark to “become a better person”, but to organically grow like a flower or a tree does. We change. We grow up. We leave childish notions and toxic behaviors behind when we’re ready.
In regards to approach, it’s about whether or not we are mindful of what it is we’re doing while we’re doing it. Mindfulness is a tricky thing. Just like selfcare, it is a popular buzzword that means different things to different people. And worse, it sounds exactly like what it is not…a mind full. Careful attention might be a better name for it. But it’s not really about focus or concentration per se. It’s more about being free of narrative as you do something, so that you can fully and completely experience it as it is. When you eat that gourmet ice cream, is it always like the first time? Are you thinking about other things or fully immersed in the indescribable experience?
Selfcare isn’t something one masters either. It is itself an evolutionary process that must meet us where we are as we grow. So yeah, indulge in the ice cream if it makes you feel better now. But remember that maybe, just maybe, there are even better choices out there for you. Maybe selfcare is about discovering them for yourself.
About the Author:
Beth Ciesco is your Selfcare Specialist, a certified yoga teacher and meditation facilitator. Check out the rest of the website to learn more about Restorative Healing Yoga, Mirror Meditation, E-Motion Alchemy, and Voicework as capital S Selfcare tools. You can also follow her on these sites:
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