Tag: spiritual warrior

silent scream

Healing Our Self-Destruction

Is Silence Complicity?

I try not to get involved in this blog on highly polarizing current events, but I can no longer keep silent about the genocidal atrocities happening in Gaza and around the world in which innocent civilians of any sex and age (aren’t innocent men as worthy of life as women and children?) along with all traces of both their humanity and civilizations are systematically annihilated like inconsequential fodder for the fearful, hateful, purely pathological, greed-driven motives of others, reinforced by the gas-lit ineptitude of mainstream media, out-of-touch politicians complicit as long as their pockets are lined and infiltrated institutions masquerading as societally concerned, while undermining every right and liberty we possess. We are witnessing not only a genocide, but a global suicide that surpasses understanding. Therefore, I cannot keep silent. It is time to speak to healing our self-destruction.

An Inner Scream

I can no longer tolerate the pompous righteousness of the morally twisted who defend such atrocity. I am so thoroughly disgusted and sickened by the lies and justifications being used to prop up toxic egos, to propagate categorical brainwashing lies spending billions for destruction instead of creation. There is a colossal scream ripening within me and I promise it will break not only speakers, earbuds, and amplifiers but eardrums and blood vessels when I let it rip. Not my eardrums and blood vessels mind you, but those of the demons who are running wild on the face of this beautiful, beleaguered planet.

My scream is for the mothers mourning their dead or maimed children. It is for the innocent little child whose family, home and every belonging is lost to them forever. It is for the doctors whose patients’ lives they just miraculously saved despite a complete lack of anything he needed as he ducks once again from the bombs falling over his head. It’s for the thirsty one at the refugee camp who just wants one tiny sip of water, now more precious than gold. It’s for the lover of knowledge and critical thinking whose eyes burn with the ashes of his beloved university up in flames, all those treasured books lost. It’s for the worshipper of God whose beautiful temple built by his ancestors has been reduced to rubble. It’s for the journalist wanting to show the world a inconvenient reality but being silenced at every turn, relentlessly continuing even as his own family is murdered. That’s just the tip of the iceberg. My scream could shatter the earth herself.

But Words Are Useless

There are those who are approaching the crisis with diplomacy, attempting to give a platform for debate and discussion, but in my opinion, the time for ‘talking’ has long since past. Communication can no longer happen constructively on the level of concepts. In fact, doing so only entrenches the ego. Those of us with ears to still discern fact from fiction can’t possibly “listen” to the views of those who are completely mentally corrupt. It’s like listening to gibberish or worse…because it is quite literally poisonous to sanity. To those who are capable of listening without complete physiological rejection, who can hold space for such words, I humbly salute you and your gift.

Most would assume then that I am taking an extremist view and encouraging some kind of physical battle. Hardly. Has history taught us nothing? War solves nothing. It only ever costs and far, far more than it’s ever worth, which is why the profiteers of the war machine love it and do anything to ensure its necessity. No. I’m recommending a different approach…on a completely different dimension of reality. Neither am I advocating for more hatred or terror. This too, quite obviously, serves none but those who profit from such base feelings and actions.

Healing Our Self-Destruction

As I already alluded and as my title affirms, atrocity of any kind is self-destruction, the absolute antithesis of Divine Me Time. We are not separate organisms; we are all cells within one body. And at the moment, we are fighting a virulent cancer. The cancer would have us eternally dividing and polarizing, endlessly fighting and destroying. We can no longer afford to be caught up in surface appearances and paradigms that speak to what is readily becoming ancient history. Reality has already changed. It is up to us to catch up. So based on this understanding of oneness, those who are called to practice a spiritual activism can employ the following techniques.

Tonglen Meditation

I often cultivate compassion for the traumatized souls and the mentally ill who have become so self-obsessed and confused in their hearts and minds as to have no sense of soul, but my compassion is not to be mistaken for weakness. I can send love to the freakshow personalities and mouthpieces governing our world because on the ultimate level, I know they are also made of the same God-stuff as we all are, albeit completely unplugged and inherently dangerous.

I can find an inner mercy towards their lost souls and realize that it also my soul. They are playing out a role that I have cast out of myself into the world and it is up to me to bring it back in, acknowledge it, and integrate it so that they may be freed from the weighty duty to show it to me…however distorted the reflection. This is a form of tantra in the truest sense of the word (and not some sexualized, bastardized, western version of it) known as Tonglen in Buddhism.

This requires a recognition of the interconnectedness of all beings, one that transcends nationality, religion, history, politics and everything else. It is a path that requires self-inquiry, shadow work, mirror work, and Divine Me time. It requires feeling, truth-telling, sacrifice and trust. It requires courage and fortitude, and faith in an ultimate justice.

Daily Hygiene

This is also something I’ve recommended numerous times before…practicing of a daily spiritual hygiene whether that takes the form of some kind of meditation, prayer, chanting, movement practice, walk in nature…whatever is necessary to empty the person of all personhood as many times a day as possible or necessary to maintain a certain equanimity and clarity.

No point mincing words. We can no longer afford projection, blame, hatred, or emotional immaturity. We can no longer afford our delusions and fear-induced need to control. We wake up now or we continue to devolve and suffer greater and greater atrocity.

 

From Wounded Empath to Spiritual Warrior

What, pray tell, is a wounded empath?

I’ve encountered my share of wounded empaths on my own healing journey. I feel uniquely qualified to write about this because I used to be one! And I can’t say 100% that I don’t sometimes slip into that stance from time to time, but I’ve definitely become more aware of any such tendency and regularly employ certain antidotes, which I’ll below.

We All Have a Little Empath & Narc Inside

First nevermind that it is my belief that we are all empaths to some extent, this post is about something more specific. It’s about the people who believe themselves to be empaths, rather than merely empathic, and specifically those who have done none of their own shadow work. They are a confusing, toxic breed not much different than a narcissist, although again, we are all narcissists to some extent. If I haven’t yet offended you and you’re still reading this, great! We’re off to a good start.

First, let me address the “to some extent” aspects of both empaths and narcissists.

The irony is that, generally speaking, people who are aware of these terms tend to believe themselves to be empaths and others in their lives to be narcissists. Empaths are very rarely in touch with their own narcissism or tendency to assume and project. Meanwhile, narcissists rarely are in touch with their own capacity to be empathic, unless that capacity is being used strategically to serve their narcissism. In other words, they can read and register your sadness, for example, and use that to their advantage but they cannot connect it to any internal compassion as any empath could. But again, I’m not really concerned about addressing narcissists in this post. That subject has been milked to death already!

The Emotional Slime of the Wounded Empath

So to answer the original question, “what is a wounded empath?”, the wounded empath is someone who hasn’t processed the difference between projection and perception. Their own emotional aura is a cloud of unprocessed mixed feelings. They are easily triggered by emotions they themselves have not yet fully come to terms with, so when they see an expression or “pick up” a vibe from elsewhere, rather than clarity, they register an assumptive explanation, projecting their own emotional discomforts or even judgments onto the other.

Unlike the narcissist, when they sense you are sad, for example, (whether or not this is true), their compassion mechanism contorts and generates pity and/or a completely false sense of resonance. For the one who is the object of their projection, it can feel like getting emotionally slimed. Yuck! Or if they perceive rage, their compassion may not fire at all because they have not connected to their own inner rage. Their inability to validate the reality of rage can feel like dismissal.

From Wounded Empath to Spiritual Warrior

A wounded empath who does “the work” becomes a clear seer. They know what is theirs and what is another’s. But they hold no arrogance and make no claims when it comes to specifics. They are not just compassionate, but ruthlessly so, unwilling to coddle another’s ego and especially not their own. And they can hold space for just about anything with wisdom and strength without the need to “impose”. The emotional experience of another is neither judged nor dismissed, but simply witnessed. What’s more, the clear empath doesn’t need to defend their own stance.

If you recognize yourself as a wounded empath and are mature enough to recognize the damage you are doing your own psyche by continuing to project your own stuff, make assumptions about others, and leave unexamined the need to be right, and if you’re not sure what you’re doing wrong or how to start to change it, look no further than the best-selling book, The Four Agreements, by don Miguel Ruiz. On the surface, this book seems simplistic and obvious, but if you work with it instead of just read it, if you practice what it preaches, you will be well on your way to healing so that you can step into your Spiritual Warriorhood.

I share with you here three of the four agreements which I feel have the most application:

Make No Assumptions

As an empath, if you are picking up some vibe from another person or group of people, don’t assume you understand it or have them all figured out. It is merely energy and is open to misinterpretation. Be willing to ask about it. Be willing to be told it’s none of your business. And be willing to be wrong about what you think it is. Don’t fall prey to the notion that empaths are always right; a little humility goes a long way. You do not know another better than they know themselves, so just forget that nutty notion.

Take Nothing Personally

Wounded empaths tend to be a little “trigger happy”. In other words, they are easily triggered by what they perceive to be another person’s lack of compassion for them. Nothing anyone does or says is ever about you. Not even if it’s seemingly about you on the surface. You may indeed be reading a facial expression or emotion correctly (and you may not), but that doesn’t mean you necessarily understand what is at the heart of it. People are complicated. Don’t reduce them to meet your level of comfort. And don’t use them to hurt yourself.

And know that I’m not judging you for being sensitive. Of course you are. You wouldn’t be empathic without it. But don’t become a victim of that sensitivity. No one is here to make you feel safe. That’s an inside job.

Be Impeccable with Your Word

This one frequently comes up in a teachy/preachy way. When speaking about what you believe to be true or about your philosophies of life, watch how you express yourself. Are you including the entire world in your feeling with grand sweeps of “we” this and “we” that? Because I guarantee you’re only expressing your experience and others will have their own, which may or may not be the same. So leave them some room to exist!

In other words, when exercising your empathic abilities, it is far wiser to use “I” statements than “you” or “we” statements, especially when discussing feelings and perceptions.

The Shadow Work Continues

The Four Agreements are a great launching point for healing the wounded empath, but they aren’t enough. It is essential to also commit to the shadow work of reclaiming the disowned self. It’s more than I can get into here, but if you are not familiar with the concept of shadow work, you can read more about it here.

Day 14: Yes

An ongoing personal exploration of Divine Guidance and distinguishing between the voice of fear and the voice of love reflecting on the article, How to Distinguish Between Divine Guidance and Fear/Ego/Imagination, on Sir Froggie’s PositiveNews Network .

Today’s pairing is:

Divine Guidance will give you a feeling of “Yes, that’s it. I knew that’s what I should do.”
Ego throws out nondescript suggestions that leave you feeling fearful and/or confused.

The keyword here to me is “feeling”. A feeling of “yes” is so much more reliable than a string of words trying to tell me what to do. Trouble is, at various times in my life, I have not been able to access that feeling, not because “yes” wasn’t the answer, but because the yes was so obscured by fearful and confused thinking or even a byproduct of that thinking. Sometimes, the only thing I could do was suspend belief entirely and wait it out.

I think these times come to us for a reason. They illuminate things we’re ready to see…like the depth at which the ego operates and controls and therefore the extent to which it blocks the Source. But what a challenge it can be to come out the other side!

When we face the layers of the split within, the deeper we go, the more painful (however fascinating) it can be. The more insistent becomes the voice of fear knowing all to well it is on its death bed. It pulls out every stop, kicking and screaming. If we lose our vigilance, if we succumb, we can fall very much asleep again, blanketed in the comfort of the familiar. Here, the “yes” we hear or even feel is simply relief…an “amen” that we still exist, our belief system intact.

The spiritual warrior does not cease. The spiritual warrior uses the sword of doubt to cut through this matrix until the “yes” that resounds is the only pure thing remaining. Sometimes we have to let go of everything in order to hear it…yes, even our most cherished concepts.

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