We all carry expectations, whether for ourselves, others, the world, even the divine. We might not even be aware of them until they are either confirmed (I knew that would happen!) or disappointed (Ug, let down again!).
Some of us were taught to set high expectations. Dream big. Demand excellence. Expect the best. And while that can be empowering, it can also become rigid. When things don’t go as planned, we feel disappointed, frustrated, or like we failed.
Others learned to keep expectations low, to avoid getting hurt. We expect little from people, love, or life so we won’t be surprised when it falls short. But low expectations often create exactly that: low results. Low joy. Low energy. We close the door before life even has a chance to enter.
But what if there’s a third path?
No expectations.
Having no expectations doesn’t mean giving up or disengaging. Rather, it means showing up with presence, not preconceptions. We let go of the need to control outcomes and instead trust that life has wisdom beyond our mental projections.
No expectations is a state of surrender and trust that creates space: space for something new to emerge. Space for people to be who they are. Space for you to experience what’s actually here, not what you hoped or feared would be.
Try This:
- Pick one area of your life where you’re holding strong expectations (healing, partnership, business, etc.)
- Gently name the expectation.
- Ask: Is this serving me, or constricting me?
- Try softening into openness.
- Say to yourself: “I release the outcome. I stay with what’s now, what’s real, and trust the unfolding.”
- Then give this music medicine selfcare practice a try…
Final Thought:
Just to clarify, you are allowed to want good and beautiful things. But you’re also allowed to let go, to be surprised, delighted or even redirected. Having no expectation is the doorway to the deepest grace.
Would you like to take a deeper look at your unconscious expectations that may be sabotaging your joy? Work with me!